


This Is War

by la_la_layne



Category: Berserk (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, Blood, Blood and Gore, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Canon - Anime, Death, F/M, Fanfiction, Friendship/Love, Golden Age (Berserk), Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Love, Manga & Anime, Original Character(s), Rape/Non-con Elements, Ratings: R, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-08
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2021-01-25 06:46:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21351964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/la_la_layne/pseuds/la_la_layne
Summary: Joanna Wyndham, older sister to Charlotte is rightful heir to the throne but doesn't want the crown. She runs away from home and stumbles upon the Band of the Hawk.
Relationships: Charlotte/Griffith (Berserk), Griffith (Berserk)/Reader, Guts (Berserk)/Reader, Judeau/Original Female Character(s) (Berserk), Judeau/Reader
Kudos: 24





	1. Chapter 1

The soft glow of the morning sun began to rise among Midland. Its orange hue illuminating even the darkest nooks of the woods. The palace was quickly within the suns rays, causing the royals and servants, to awaken. The King of Midland had woke without a stir, hastily getting ready for his long day along with two servants at his assistance. His Queen was getting ready in the other room, her corset being tightened with the help of her handmaid. The young princess Charlotte remained asleep, curled up comfortably under her duvet covers like a child. She awoke though when she heard the sound of metal clanging together, knowing all too well where the sound was coming from. She rubbed the tired from her eyes and slowly stood from her bed, her nightgown laying elegantly to her shins. Making her way to her window across the room, she opened the latch, peering her head out below to the courtyard. “Joanna! Would you please keep it down?” The princess called in tired desperation. The other female heard her name and sheathed her sword, taking off her helmet to let her long brown hair flow freely. “I’m sorry, sister! But you know I practice sword fighting in the morning!” Joanna shot her younger sister a soft smile. Charlotte let out an exasperated sigh and closed her window, retreating back into her room. The elder sister shook her head and smiled before putting her helmet back on, looking to her instructor as she unsheathed her sword once again, “Shall we continue?”

An hour past and the sun was now shining brightly in the blue sky, only a few white clouds apparent. The dining hall had been set, the kitchen getting the preparations together to serve the royal family for breakfast. The King and Queen were sat at the rather large table. The King sat at the head of the table and his wife at the end. Princess Charlotte arrived shortly after, taking her place at the left side of the table, leaving the right side for her sister to sit whom had yet to arrive. The three sat comfortably as they awaited Joanna’s arrival. They looked to each other in slight annoyance as time past, the food already prepared in the kitchen. The chef walked into the dining room, over to his king and bowed before he whispered to him in a hushed tone. “Majesty, breakfast is ready to be served. Are we waiting on Princess Joanna’s arrival?” The King looked to his wife and youngest before replying to the chef. “No, we shall eat now.” The chef bowed his head before leaving to the kitchen, the servants shortly bringing pour the variety of breakfast foods fit for the royal family. Ranging from ham, to biscuits and gravy, to eggs and so much more. Once everything had been set, the King smiled to his family. ‘Now, shall we say Grace-“ his sentence was cut short before his eldest daughter pushed through the double doors, adjusting the laces on the back of her dress, looking disheveled. The family turned their heads in Joanna’s direction as she sat in her place at the table, a sheepish smile on her face. “My apologies for being late.. I was just-“ “Sword fighting again.” her father cut her off. She turned her head to look at him, her smile dropping. The mother and daughter looked to each other in an uncomfortable gaze, knowing what was ahead. This wouldn’t be the first time Joanna was late to breakfast. The eldest daughter let out a breath before speaking again softly, “Yes, father and I apologize again.” she tried to remain calm and collected, hating to show weakness of any sort. “Joanna, when are you finally going to come to your senses and be responsible?” Her father said to her in an angered tone. She hung her head in defeat, hating when her father got like this. “You are heir to the throne, are you not?” Joanna folded her hands in lap and bit the inside of her cheek. If she was being honest with herself, she didn’t want the throne. She felt that being a princess was not who she was. “Father.. I know I am. But I don’t want-“ “Exactly.” The King cut her off once again. Silence fell among the dining table, Joanna not daring say anything further. After a few short moments, the King spoke up again, “Everyone dig in.” He stated before beginning to plate himself some of the delicious food displayed before them. The family followed suit, eating in an uncomfortable silence.

The evening quickly approached that day. The sun had set and the mood took place high up in the sky, shining brightly along with the countless stars. Joanna asks passed on supper, the events from this morning making her feel sick to her stomach. She hated when her father got angry with her. The eighteen year old sat at her bedside, her favorite sword laying in her hands. This piece of silver was crafted specially for her after she practically begged their blacksmith to make it for her. She stared at her reflection in the sword in deep thought, quickly snapping out of it once she heard a few soft knocks on her bedroom door. She scurried, putting the sword in its sheath and shoving it underneath her bed, knowing her father hated it when she kept weapons in her quarters. Joanna then got into bed, pulling the covers over her legs and called out to the visitor on the other side of the bed in a tired tone, not wanting them to know that she had been awake all this time. "Come in." She sat back and looked to the door as doorknob turned with a faint squeak, her father's figure coming into view. The princess mentally sighed, knowing a lecture was ahead. "I hope I didn't wake you." Her father said in a soft tone, walking over to his daughter in bed. She pushed herself up and scooted over, allowing more space for her father to sit. The King slowly sat at her bedside, the mattress sinking slightly from the change in weight. "Joanna, I'm sorry about the events in the dining hall this morning." The female smiled faintly and shook her head, looking up at him. "There is nothing to forgive." She said softly and he leaned forward, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of her head. He spoke again as he pulled back, "But you do know that I can't allow you to continue your lessons from here on out, right? That sentence struck her hard, a pain forming in her chest. "What?" she said in a pained voice, looking to her father in disbelief. "You will be queen one day, Joanna. You need to start acting like one. That means doing what a queen would do, which doesn't include sword fighting or anything of the like." The princess hung her head, tears forming in her eyes. "Tomorrow your other will walk you through the basics. I've already spoken to your instructor who I had relieved from his duties this afternoon." Joanna's eyes widened and she snapped her head up to look to the King once again. "You did what-?! But father he didn't-" "Enough, Joanna." he stared sternly, "I've had enough of this. You are going to give sword fighting up and that's final. No daughter of mine is bringing dishonor to this family." And on that note the King stood and swiftly left the room, the door slamming shut behind him. The girl burst into tears, not believing everything that just happened. She thought her father understood but she realized she was wrong.

After a while of weeping, the princess had calmed her cries. Her eyes red and puffy and her cheeks tear stained. She left out a shaky breath and stood from her place in bed, walking across the room to her window, unlocking it and looking out to the trees in the nearby forest swaying slightly in the midnight breeze. The brunette turned her head back to her bed, looking to her sword underneath before looking back to the view again. And before she knew it, she was changing into her usual training clothes which consisted of thick, fitted pants, a drawstring shirt and knee high boots. She pulled on her hooded cloak and grabbed her sword from its place, adjusting the sheath around her waist. Joanna then went to her bed, taking the sheets off and tying herself a rope to safely climb on. Once she had it made she let one end down out of her window to get as close to the ground as she could, attaching the other end to something sturdy enough in her room to hold her weight. The princess put her hair in a messy side braid before going to her beside table, grabbing a quill with ink and parchment to write a letter for her parents. She finished the note and propped it up on her pillow before going to her window, climbing down the sheet rope quickly and carefully. Once she made it to the ground she went to the tree that stood next to the wall and climbed up, getting to the top of the wall, having to jump and landing with a quiet 'umph'. Joanna looked back at the castle just behind her with a sad smile. She hated the idea of leaving her family but felt that she didn't really have a choice at this point. As she turned back around she pulled her hood up and ran straight for the forest, not looking back again as she made her escape.


	2. II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joanna is welcomed into the Black Ram Knights and fights the Band of the Hawk.

A week has past since Joanna escaped the cage she had called home. She had struggled at first trying to keep herself alive. After all, it was a big transition coming from having everything handed to you on a silver platter. She was falling ill at one point from dehydration, struggling to find clean water. Until one day she wandered onto a rather large campsite, seeming to hold perhaps a whole army of men. She slowly emerged when it seemed that the coast was clear. Quickly spotting a canteen of water, she couldn't help herself as she started downing it. Suddenly a strong hand spun her around, causing her to drop the canteen. "What do you think you're doing boy-" a rough voice yelled out and stopped up son seeing the girl's face and long hair peeking through from under her hood. Her wide eyes looked up at him for a moment. He had short reddish brown hair and blue eyes, standing a good foot taller than her. "A girl?" He more so stated this, his army of men now looking at her as they stepped from out of the darkness of the woods. "Now what's a girl like you doing out her in the big bad woods, aye?" She stayed quiet though, her eyes narrowing slightly. "Not talking huh? Well we could force some words out of you, if you'd prefer?" The stranger said this with a slight smile, raising his sword. Joanna took a quick look around as the other men rose their weapons, following suit. Fear started selling up inside her, she had never had to use her swords fighting lessons in a real life situation before. "We're not too fond of folks who steal." He got into a battle stance, looking down at the girl menacingly. She swallowed the nervous lump in her throat before speaking steadily. "How about a bargain? I'll fight one of you, and if I win, you let me go." The tall stranger cocked a brow in slight interest. "And if you lose?" Joanna took another quick look around before looking back into the man's eyes. "Then you can punish me for stealing, I won't try to run." She said, sounding confident but honestly was scared for her life. The stranger smiled at this, slowly nodding his head. "Alright! Choose your opponent, girl."  
Joanna nodded and slowly walked around to get a better look at each of the men. They all looked pretty intimidating in her opinion. Until she spotted one that was showing just a hint of nervousness. The princess pushed hood down as she stared him down, seeing him only grow more nervous, sweating profusely. Just as she thought, girls made him nervous. "I choose this man." She gestured to the man, turning her head to look at who seemed to be their leader again. Quiet murmurs erupted amongst the rest of the soldiers. "So be it!" He stated excitedly, "Positions please!" Joanna nodded as the others made room for the fight. She took a good amount of steps back, unsheathing her sword and removing her cloak. Her opponent, slowly unsheathes his sword, shaking slightly. "The first the disarm their opponent is the winner!" The girl stared her opponent down, taking a few steady breaths. "Ready? Fight!"

Joanna was going to allow the man in front of her to advance first but noticed him hesitating. It's not every day a man fought a woman like this. She smiled slightly at his and advance quickly, lunging forward, swinging her sword from the left to the right in a downward diagonal motion. The man stumbled back at the sudden force and partied to defend himself. Excited shouting started up from the remaining men, watching in anticipation. The nervous opponent attack back, swinging his sword downward. The princess dodged and quickly turned to step behind him. As the solder spun around and raised his sword to attack, Joanna ducked underneath his attack and swung her sword down on top of his, the force causing the sword to fall from his hand, making a "clank" sound as it fell to the ground.Everyone's eyes went wide, including the leader who was in utter shock. The young girl let out a long breath, realizing she had been holding it, a smile starting to take over her features. "The girl wins!" The tall man yelled out, the soldiers couldn't help but applaud, honestly impressed with her. She walked over to meet the leader again, sheathing her sword. "You're free to go, he stated holding out a hand for her to shake. "My name is Gien, general of the Black Ram Iron Lance Knights. And you are?" She hesitated and looked up at him, not really sure of whether to give him her real name or not. She looked away from him for a brief moment before looking back at him. "J- Jane." She stated with a slight smile, my name is Jane. "Well Jane! You're welcome to join me and my men on our expedition. You surely seem to have proven yourself." "You mean.. become a knight?" The girl looked up at him in disbelief. "Sure! Unofficially of course, we haven't exactly had a female join before! Let alone, fight one of us! Plus this way, you can come and go as you please. It's not like you really have something to keep yourself with us. We're just looking for some extra skill to help us win any battles that may come our way. And you definitely seem to have that! So, what do you say?" Joanna found herself smiling, excitement building up inside her. "I'll join you!"

About a year passed since that day. Joanna kept quiet about her true identity, honestly afraid of what would happen if people knew that she was the princess of Midand. Gien taught Joanna skills and techniques to better improve her sword fighting along with some basics of living as a knight on the move. It's not often they settle down in the middle of a war. She even learned how to use a bow and arrow. Gien liked having all his men shoot off arrows all at once to rain down on his opponents. It was usually proven to be pretty effective. Joanna also received proper armor, it matching the black with yellow highlights of the rest of the knights, along with a black helmet with ram horns to represent who she fought for.It was a bright early afternoon, the skies a beautiful blue with puffy white clouds decorating it; a beautiful day for a battle. The Black Ram Knights have gone over their plan the previous night. They were to take on Midland Knights, the very kind Joanna was hoping to avoid, they caught for her father's kingdom after all. She kept quite and obedient though, feeling more ready than ever to fight. Gien and his knights met the Midland army in an open grassy area, them just yards away in clear sight. "Ready men! Pull!" He raised his swords and swung it forward to signal the knight to shoot their bow and arrows. "Fire!" The arrows rained down on the Midland knights, killing a small fraction of them, but it was riven effective. Gien and some of his men charged forward, the rest of his men, including Joanna following closely, weapons at the ready. "Head them off. Kill anything that moves." He ordered as he charged in, a horn sounding off as the knights went in. slaughtering the enemy with their large silver jousting spears.

Joanna charged in shooting a few soldiers down with her bow and arrow on horseback. "Charge! We will take the King's head in name of the Black Ram Iron Lance Heavy Calvary!" Gien yelled as the knights continued on, losing a few men on the way but still attacking at full force. Him and a group of men starts curling along the outside until they spotted a single soldier riding in their direction at full speed. He wasn't wearing Midland armor though, so they weren't quite sure who he was. "That fool!" Gien couldn't help but laugh. "He's gonna fight is all by himself?" He led his men to close the distance between them and the mysterious shoulder. "I'll trample him to dust!" The two men had their weapons drawn, ready for impact. As they closed the distance, the solder parried Gien's attack and in an instant, sliced through him with his rather large sword, sending him flying though the hair and hitting the ground with a loud thud. Joanna saw this happen on the sidelines, shock written all over her face. The other Black Ram Knights were just as shocked. "What?" "He killed General Gien with just one swing!" The princess couldn't believe her ears. 'Gien? Dead?' She started riding with a group of Gien's men, the never before seen man cutting through soldiers with ease. 'He must be with Midland! Dammit!" She thought, cutting down enemies on her way, sword in hand.

Suddenly she yelped in pain, noticing an arrow in her thigh. She whipped her head around to see a new group of soldiers appear, one in pure white among them, shooting arrows from behind them. "We're being flanked!" "Is that the Band of the Hawk?" Some of her men said in shock and a little bit of fear. Joanna had only heard about them recently. But they weren't expecting to run into them in battle. She watched closely as Band's leader signal his men to fire more arrows. "Jane, move!" She scrambled with the reigns on her horse, starting to get away as fast as she could. Her house suddenly cried out in pain, falling to the ground. "Eh-?!" Joanna looked back, seeing a couple arrows in her horses leg. She let go of the reigns and rolled off of her horse as it hit the ground. The girl cursed in frustration going to stand up but whimpered, just now remembering the arrow in her own leg and the pain that it brought to move on it. What now? If an enemy saw her she was done for.  
She looked up and noticed her remaining knights of her team starting to retreat. She let out a quick sigh and gripped the arrow in her leg, using all of her strength to pull it out. She screamed in pain but quickly pulled it out, started to run for her life. It wasn't long until she felt the blood trickling down her leg. She kept running though, just wanting to get out of their. But unfortunately someone noticed this and shot another arrow into her arm. Joanna fell at the sudden impact, on the brink of tears from the pain. Her vision started to go and she felt her ears ringing, she must of hit the ground pretty hard. Just a short moment after, a horse approached her. The user dismounting, and unsheathing his sword. 'I'm gonna die.' She thought, lifting her head the best she could but I was difficult, the helmet still on. Her attacker bent down and pulled the helmet off her head, tossing it aside before pointing the sword at her chin, causing her to lift her head. In front of her stood who she assumed was the leader of the Band of the Hawk, in bright silver armor with a white cape, his helmet shaped to represent a bird. Once his eyes landed on her face he stopped in surprise, sheathing his sword again. Joanna blinked, her vision going again as the soldier removed his helmet to reveal his quite beautiful pale face with piercing blue eyes and long flowing white hair. This was the last thing she saw before she lost consciousness.


End file.
